THE LAKE

We sat in peace beside the lake
Mosquitoes buzzed in anticipation
The setting sun glistened on the still water as it began its trip into the horizon
The night sounds began to emerge
The crickets chirped, the frogs croaked, music to my ears
A light breeze joined in, conducting a symphony of trees
Rustling leaves in perfect harmony
Tiny waves lapping at the shore with a steady beat
Natures perfect rhythm
A fish jumps to accent the melody
Laughter drifts across the lake from the far side, feint and lilting like a subdued flute solo
I wonder if they can hear the song
They must, it fills the air
In the distance, thunder claps its applause
The approaching storm adds a light show to the concert
The rain will begin soon, bringing the curtain down on this masterpiese

SAW

EXERCISE

My wife invested $40.00 in a piece of exercise equipment. It looks like the mutation of a stair stepper and a cross country ski machine. It even has a digital counter so that you'll know, at a glance, the exact number of steps it takes to cause a coronary. It's so quiet, my wife informs me, that we can use it in front of the television without disturbing anyone. So, there it sits, a constant reminder, an albatross around my neck, staring at me as I munch my chips and watch M*A*S*H* reruns. A piece of furniture with an attitude. It mocks my physique with its piercing eyes and makes rude gestures when I step outside for a cigarette. Don't tell me its not alive. Nobody else can hear it, but I can. It wants me and will not give up until I'm dead. I know how it ended up at that thrift store. It killed the last owner or at least drove him to suicide with it's constant harping. The surviving members of the family gave it away and I can only feel contempt for them. They obviously have little regard for human life. It should have been destroyed and buried. It will kill again. It's stronger tha you or I and it murders for pleasure.

SAW

EYE BEFORE E EXCEPT AFTER SEA

It's I before E except after C. Drop the E before adding ING. So far so good, pretty basic stuff. F as in fish, PH as in phase and GH as in enough. Now it's starting to lose me. I swear I heard 3 Fs.I don't know whether to laugh or cry, but cry doesn't have an I and laugh doesn't have an F. Then theres the T that sounds like an S in TION and the C that doesn't sound at all in science. Silent letters, why?.Speaking of why,why the H. That's H as in hop, hat and howdy. The Y in sky sounds like IE in pie or the I all by itself in pi. An I sounds like an I but then again so does eye. Back to the TION which can be SION. So TI,CI and SI all sound like SH when preceding ON. Then there's FAUX PAS which sounds like FOO PA. It's french but it's in my dictionary, as if my own language wasn't confusing enough.

SAW

I remember

I remember the fear and I'm angry. I remember the anger and I'm afraid. The faces , the places, the screams of pain and the death are blurred by time yet vivid enough to cause my muscles to tense and my fists to clench. That chapter of my life is long over but I can't completly let go. It churns inside me like boiling water and releases its steam at a time of its own choosing,totally independent of my will. I want answers that will nw\ever come. I want to make sense of the sensless. I want light and substance given to my shadows so that I might face them down and drive them from my mind. My memories are fragmented and less than clear. Where others recount battles, engagements, locations and and people with clarity my recollections of the war in Viet Nam are foggy at best. The fog is dense enough to mute the whole picture but not thick enough to keep the more disturbing fragments out. I see myself kneeling in the rain holding the hand of a dying marine. He's laying on a poncho,blood mixed with rain water pooling around him. I see the watch on his wrist clearly. I see his eyes, wide and unblinking. He makes no sound and I know that he's dying. I dont recall his name,his rank or how he was mortally wounded.I don't remember where we were or even what year it was,yet the scene will not leave me. The charred body behind the wheel of a burned out truck. The stench of rotting enemy bodies being exhumed from shallow graves for a reason I cant recall. The sight of arial flares illuminating a hoard of advancing enemy soldiers stepping on and over their fallen comrades. I hear the sound of mortar shells leaving their tubes knowing that I'm their target. I remember the boredom of laying in ambush all night, waiting in anticipation and fear of an unseen enemy that never came. The sounds of a fire fight, the distinctive crack of an AK47, leaders barking orders,returning fire,an officer crying loudly, his legs shattered by automatic weapon fire. The sudden end. The deathly quiet,the call for a corpsman,the order to regroup, the moaning of the wounded, the fear that attacks the body after the battle is over. I talk to pilots of spotter planes, phantoms and choppers. I tossed a smoke grenade and guided a medevac to landing. I felt the ground shake as jets strafed and bombed enemy positions a few short yards away. I remember,enough or too much I don't know but I remember and I always will. My son is a marine now. I,m damned proud and a little scared. I'm proud of his skill and devotion and frightened at the thought of losing him. I fear the possibility of memories,his memories, of battles not yet fought in wars not yet waged. I remember..........

I wrote this about 18 years ago. My son and I both alive and kicking, making our way in the world[ my son doing a much better than I, as it should be]. I dusted this off because the story isn't over. Different names and places same script. I'm neither pro nor anti war. War seems to be a fact of life generation after generation. Honor those who served especially those who gave all.
SAW